The Path to Becoming Friendless

I, dear reader, am on the path to becoming friendless. As a direct result of my schizoid personality, I am slowly alienating everyone around me until I become a hermit. This journey is somewhat intentional, and somewhat unintentional.

It starts with the end of school. Since school's out for the summer, I do not have the opportunity (or, if you will, the burden) of seeing my companions five days a week, week after week after week. Thus, I do not communicate with said companions as much as I would during school. This results in my distancing away from my friends, literally and figuratively.

Next comes the denial of invitations. People are sure to invite me places (unless of course I've done something to upset them - another part of the plan) over the summer and I will politely say, "Sorry, I can't. I would've loved to go, but I have plans." After a certain amount of invitations turned down, they will simply cease to ask me to go anywhere with them.

Following this is the picking up of online hobbies, specifically multiplayer games. These include but are not limited to World of Warcraft (haven't gotten there yet) and League of Legends (LEVEL 8, BITCHES! YEEEEHAWW). These activities will increase my social awkwardness tenfold as, in public, I will feel the urge to right-click to move around and press the Q, W, E, and R buttons at people I don't like. This will cause people to look at me weird, making me feel uncomfortable and prompting me to Recall back to my base.

Lastly, I'll be a jerk. No one likes jerks.

These four factors will probably make people want to distance themselves from me, making my plan successful. Hurr hurr hurr.